Last Call feedback

xep-0458.xml

@@ -8,7 +8,7 @@
 	<header>
 		<title>Community Code of Conduct</title>
 		<abstract>
-			This document describes the XMPP Standard Foundation's Code of Conduct
+			This document describes the XMPP Standard Foundation's Code of Conduct.
 		</abstract>
 		&LEGALNOTICE;
 		<number>0458</number>
@@ -22,6 +22,12 @@
 		<shortname>N/A</shortname>
 		&dcridland;
 		&stpeter;
+  <revision>
+    <version>0.4</version>
+    <date>2023-11-30</date>
+    <initials>psa</initials>
+    <remark><p>Address Last Call feedback; complete a copy edit and apply clarifications in several places.</p></remark>
+  </revision>
   <revision>
     <version>0.3</version>
     <date>2023-09-14</date>
@@ -55,21 +61,20 @@
 	</header>
 	<section1 topic='Introduction' anchor='intro'>
 		<p>The XMPP Standards Foundation provides a number of venues, both physical and virtual, for discussion
-			and community activity. These include mailing lists, chatrooms, Summits, and so on. It also
+			and community activity. These include email lists, chatrooms, in-person Summits, and so on. It also
 			produces much output designed for the general public, such as the XEPs themselves, the website,
 			and kiosks or stands at actual events. Collectively, these are the XMPP Standards Foundation
 			Activities.</p>
 		<p>The Members of the Foundation, and the wider community of participants in the XSF Activities, are
 			diverse in viewpoints and goals. We see this as a benefit - we wish the maximize the
 			applicability and quality of our protocols, and therefore we wish to maximize the pool of
-			potential participants who might offer their unique viewpoints and help us reach new goals.</p>
+			potential participants who might offer their unique viewpoints and help us achieve our goals.</p>
 		<p>It makes sense that there is a Code of Conduct that applies to the behaviour we expect both of
-			ourselves and any other community members when participating in discussions or producing that
+			ourselves and any other community members when participating in XSF Activities, especially for the sake of that public output.</p>
-			public output.</p>
 	</section1>
 	<section1 topic='The Code of Conduct' anchor='conduct'>
 			<section2 topic="Welcome" anchor='welcome'>
-				<p>You are welcome. Ensure that you are also welcoming. We want
+				<p>You are welcome at XSF Activities. Ensure that you are also welcoming of others. We want
 				everyone to feel welcome no matter what the colour of their skin, where they live,
 				or where their ancestors came from. We want to welcome people from all
 				cultures, and religions, and of all sizes and shapes. We want people to be welcome no
@@ -79,20 +84,21 @@
 			</section2>
 		<section2 topic="Assume Good Faith" anchor='assume-good-faith'>
 			<p>We are a diverse community, working often to multiple goals. We
-				assume the best intent from each other, and do not ascribe malice. Assume that if
+				assume the best intent from each other, and do not ascribe malice to others. Assume that if
 				someone is complaining about your conduct, it is because they either genuinely feel it
-				is exclusionary to them, or they genuinely believe it is exclusionary to others - in the
+				is exclusionary to them, or they genuinely believe it is exclusionary to others - 
-				first instance, take it as a learning experience, correct your conduct and move on. If
+				simply take it as a learning experience, correct your conduct and move on. If
 				possible, assume, too, that bad conduct from others may derive from a misunderstanding
-				or a lack of that learning experience rather than a deliberate attempt to exclude - in
+				or a lack of that learning experience rather than a deliberate attempt to exclude - 
-				the first instance, correct them and move on. Do not, however, use this as an excuse for
+				simply correct them and move on. Do not, however, use this as an excuse for
-				bad conduct or a reason to ignore it.</p>
+				your own bad conduct or a reason to ignore bad conduct by others.</p>
 		</section2>
 		<section2 topic="Pick Your Words" anchor='pick-your-words'>
 			<p>A small amount of effort in ensuring your words are
 				professional and polite, and avoiding subjects and expressions that may offend, goes a
-				long way. Humour is not a mitigating factor here.</p>
+				long way. If you're unsure, it's often useful to limit your comments to the point you wish to make.</p>
-			<p>It's often useful to limit your comments to the point you wish to make if you're unsure.</p>
+                        <p>Additionally, because participants in XSF events and venues typically do not all share a common native language or culture, take extra care to ensure that your words can be understood clearly and without offense.</p>
+                        <p>Attempting to say something humourous does not excuse a poor choice of words. It is very easy for humourous statements to miss the mark.</p>
 			<p>Examples of what to avoid:</p>
 				<ul>
 					<li>Racist language, whether intentional or not.</li>
@@ -107,7 +113,7 @@
 				However, it is vital that while we are open and honest in our criticism, we do so with
 				the calm respect we expect of others and with tolerance for other points of view.</p>
 			<ul>
-				<li>Try to be open over your point of view, intents and
+				<li>Try to be open regarding your point of view, intents and
 				interests when expressing critique: this helps to discuss the different
 					points of view in a constructive way.</li>
 				<li>Try phrasing comments as an invitation to explore an issue.</li>
@@ -122,7 +128,7 @@
 			<p>We are, fundamentally, a community of people working to
 				share technology with each other. We should be friendly toward each
 				other, and act to support each other's efforts.</p>
-			<p>Examples of what to avoid</p>
+			<p>Examples of what to avoid:</p>
 			<ul>
 				<li>Impersonation of other people (copying their nickname, avatar, and so on).</li>
 				<li>Privacy breaches, including doxxing etc.</li>
@@ -148,7 +154,7 @@
 			a XSF chatroom or mailing list, or contribute to XSF documents such as the XEP series.</p>
 		<p>Naturally, under normal circumstances, the XMPP Standards Foundation welcomes and encourages
 			participation in XSF Activities. Nevertheless, the XSF does reserve the right to partially or
-			completely exclude anyone from any activity, for any reason.</p>
+			completely exclude anyone from any Activity, for any reason.</p>
 		<p>The final decision on such exclusions is made by the Board, who may from time to time appoint a Work
 			Team, called the Conduct Team, to act on their behalf. If the Work Team has not been appointed,
 			the Conduct Team is the Board.</p>
@@ -172,7 +178,7 @@
 				sanction bad behaviour outside of XSF Activities should the need arise.</p>
 			<p>Note also that this is not intended to mean that any XMPP developer's behaviour will be
 				scrutinised constantly - using, for example, racist language in a talk about your XMPP
-				project would be problematic here, but using sexualised language in your erotic fiction
+				project would be problematic, but using sexualised language in your erotic fiction
 				hobby is unlikely to be relevant to this Code of Conduct.</p>
 			<p>However, higher standards may be applied to those seen as representative of the community,
 				such as XSF Members and, in particular, members of the Board or Council.</p>
@@ -182,25 +188,25 @@
 		<section2 topic="Reporting" anchor='reporting'>
 			<p>If you witness bad conduct by somebody - that is, if you feel someone's behaviour does not
 				live up to this Code of Conduct - please do express your concern (calmly and gently) to that
-				person at the time, but only if you feel able. This allows the person to recognise their behaviour
+				person at the time, but only if you feel comfortable and competent to do so. This allows the person to recognise that their behaviour
-				may be problematic an correct it at the time without undue escalation. If you feel uncomfortable
+				may be problematic and to correct it at the time without undue escalation. However, if you feel uncomfortable
-				to do so that is perfectly fine and will not affect further handling of the incident.</p>
+				expressing your concern, that is perfectly fine and it will not affect further handling of the incident.</p>
-			<p>Whether or not you called it out, do one of the following:</p>
+			<p>Whether or not you expressed your concern at the time of the incident, you are encouraged to do one of the following:</p>
 			<ul>
 				<li>Let the Conduct Team know.</li>
 				<li>Let the Board know.</li>
 				<li>Let at least one member of the Board, and preferably more, know.</li>
 			</ul>
 			<p>Who you report it might depend on who was involved in the incident - you
-				may feel that members of the Conduct Team or the Board were involved or present and wish
+				may feel that members of the Conduct Team or the Board were involved or present and therefore wish
-				to report to others.</p>
+				to report the incident to people who were not involved.</p>
-			<p>It may also be in some cases people may prefer to report informally; while
+			<p>In some cases, people may prefer to report an incident informally; while
 				reporting "properly" is preferred, if possible the Conduct Team should strive to handle
 				informal reports in the same way as formal reports, while at the same time not encouraging unverifiable reports such as gossip or hearsay.</p>
-			<p>Importantly, even if someone else called it out or said to you they would report it, report
+			<p>Importantly, even if someone else expressed concern or said to you that they would report an incident, please report
-				it anyway. This ensures the Conduct Team have a clear understanding of what happened and who
+				it anyway. This helps to ensure that the Conduct Team have a clear understanding of what happened and who
 				saw the conduct, and allows the Conduct Team to identify any longer term patterns.</p>
-			<p>When you report it, include the place, date and time, and report it as calmly as
+			<p>When you report the incident, include the place, date and time, and report it as calmly as
 				possible.</p>
 		</section2>
 		<section2 topic="Consideration" anchor='consideration'>
@@ -210,12 +216,12 @@
 			<p>Finally, the Conduct Team will make a decision on whether sanctions or other actions should be taken, and determine the exact form of such sanctions or actions.</p>
 		</section2>
 		<section2 topic="Sanctions and Actions" anchor='sanctions-and-actions'>
-			<p>The purpose of a Code of Conduct is to ensure our community is as
+			<p>The purpose of a Code of Conduct is to ensure that our community is as
 				welcoming and inclusive as possible. Sanctions are by their nature exclusionary,
 				and many Actions are unlikely be to welcoming to those involved. Therefore the
 				Conduct Team must consider how to ensure the Actions they take and the
 				Sanctions they impose resolve the concerns proportionally, balancing the
-				needs of the community with the individuals that form it, with the goal of
+				needs of the community with the individuals that form it, always keeping in mind the goal of
 				maximizing inclusion and promoting positive behaviours.</p>
 			<p>The Conduct team will normally have its authority to make decisions delegated to it
 				by the Board. In some cases the Conduct Team may choose to hand its recommendation on
@@ -229,26 +235,34 @@
 				the result will be announced publicly in order to restore trust.</p>
 			<p>Sanctions may consist of having the ability to participate reduced or removed from some or
 				all XSF Activities. Actions may include discussion with the Conduct Team. These are 
-				non-exhaustive.</p>
+				only examples and are non-exhaustive.</p>
 			<p>Many minor incidents will, therefore, not be reported publicly at all, and - even if there is
-				an agreement that bad conduct occurred - may not result in any visible actions at all.</p>
+				an agreement that bad conduct occurred - may not result in any visible Actions at all.</p>
 		</section2>
 		<section2 topic="Appeal" anchor='appeal'>
-			<p>If you disagree with the decision made by the Board and you were either the subject of bad
+			<p>If you disagree with the decision made by the Conduct Team or the Board and you were either the person affected by bad
-				conduct or subject to the actions or sanctions, you may appeal in writing by sending an
+				conduct or the person subject to the Actions or Sanctions, you may appeal in writing by sending an
-				email to the Board. The Board will consider your argument as written and will normally
+				email to the Board (or to the Board via a particular member). The Board will consider your argument as written and will normally
 				respond. The Board's decision after appeal is, however, final.</p>
 		</section2>
+		<section2 topic="Situations Requiring Immediate Action" anchor='immediate'>
+                <p>The foregoing process assumes that there is time for reporting, consideration, and well-reasoned decision-making "in a quiet hour". However, two very different kinds of situation might require immediate action:</p>
+                <ol>
+                <li>Clearly offensive, threatening, or disruptive but somewhat minor behaviour, for example "drive-by" comments in online chatrooms.</li>
+                <li>Behaviour that poses a clear and present threat of physical harm, for example a fist-fight at an in-person event.</li>
+                </ol>
+                <p>In both kinds of situation, venue moderators are empowered to use their best judgment and take immediate action (in the first example, moderators might ban the sender from a chatroom; in the second example, moderators might break up a fight or call building security). However, the actions of venue moderators are always subject to appeal.</p>
+		</section2>
 	</section1>
 	<section1 topic='Security Considerations' anchor='security'>
-		<p>It is possible for almost any behaviour to have some argument why it is not, in fact, exclusionary,
+		<p>It is possible for almost any behaviour to seem justified - there could be an argument that the behaviour is not, in fact, exclusionary,
-			and why it's just someone taking offence too easily. It also is possible for the Code of Conduct
+			and that someone someone took offence too easily. It also is possible for the Code of Conduct
 			to be weaponised for exclusionary purposes, by using the complaints mechanism to stall or
-			silence valid debate. Both of these are cases where the very existence of a Code of Conduct is
+			silence valid debate. Both of these are cases where the very existence of a Code of Conduct could be
 			used for exclusionary purposes, perverting its very intent. Obviously, don't do either.</p>
-		<p>"Assume Good Faith", in particular, holds the risk of an endless argument over how far to go with
+		<p>In particular, the principle "Assume Good Faith" opens the possibility of an endless argument over how much good faith
-			that assumption, and where the burden lies - the phrasing is intended to minimize the wiggle
+			to assume, and where the burden of proof lies - the phrasing in Section 2.2. is intended to minimize ambiguity
-			room there.</p>
+			in this regard, but cannot eliminate it entirely.</p>
 		<p>There are no simple answers to these concerns. Future Boards and Conduct teams are advised to be
 			wary of both cases.</p>
 	</section1>
@@ -258,4 +272,7 @@
 	<section1 topic='XMPP Registrar Considerations' anchor='registrar'>
 		<p>This document has no considerations for the XMPP Registrar.</p>
 	</section1>
+        <section1 topic='Acknowledgements' anchor='ack'>
+		<p>Thanks to JC Brand and Guus der Kinderen for their constructive feedback.</p>
+        </section1>
 </xep>